Ways to isolate yourself and lose friends #meowing #dunnothelyrics #cartoons #doodles #flinchfreefriendship
“I can’t believe I forgot my phone. I’m gonna have to draw this, you know.” Even in drawing form Steve Martin has to ruin my picture somehow. #getyourhandoutoftheshot #friedchicken #gatfirls #chickenfingers #chickenchickenfingerlinkin #cartoon #doodles
This is something I wrote in 2006 for a performance piece I was in called The Best Imitation of Myself. (<—- yes I know that’s a Ben Fold’s lyric. It was cool in 2006.) I actually forgot about this part, but in doing some writing back and forth with a friend, I dug this up.
I was surprised to see how much of a role food has played in my life. Not just in the indulgent sort of way that I use it nowadays, but how it shapes people culturally and socially. So here’s a short tid bit from that play.
“In college, I went out with some friends to a Vietnamese restaurant. While I was looking at the menu they started laughing. Someone pretended to gag at the scent of something and when I looked over, they were trying to get Martha to smell a bottle of fish sauce. “Make her do it! It smells like vagina!”
Nuoc Mam. Fish sauce. I’ve acquired a taste for fish sauce. My mother in the kitchen, chopping garlic and smashing it together with sugar. Me, sitting in front of the television learning how to count to 10 in Spanish with Grover. She’d go to the lanai where she had made three fish tank aquariums into three makeshift herb gardens. She grew (uno) chili peppers (dos) basil (tres) mint. She’d pick a pepper and mash it into the mixture and juice a lemon.
Then from under the sink, the only place my father would allow the bottle to be, the bottle of fish sauce would emerge. My mother had a sense of pride every time the bottle made an appearance. She’d proudly read some of the words from the side of it and nod approvingly.
My sisters would hold their noses and run into the bedroom and lock the door behind them, afraid that the smell was gonna get in their hair and then they’d smell like some kind of Vietnamese person.
My mom made me a plate of cucumbers and drizzled the nuoc mam on it and I’d sit in front of the television, loving the way that the saltiness mixed with the crystallized sugar and the heat on my lips. She’d beam at me exclaiming “You are a little Vietnamese girl!”
And in the restaurant, poor Martha was still being forced to take a whiff of the bottle. I told them that we didn’t have to eat here. We could always just go down to Panchos and get burritos. They put the bottle down and Martha looked relieved.”
Yes, it’s the dumbest day of the year, but music is my boyfriend today. Happy Venereal Disease everyone! Rock out to some Stevie Wonder and Leo Sayer.
Man, new slippers are great. Thanks for everything #uggaustralia. #funemployment starts now with some netflix and coffee. #sothisis30
Rocky and I have so much in common. We pick out the kibble we don’t like and throw it on the floor and lick our balls. What.
This song makes me wanna star in the opening credits of a sit-com circa 1983!